I haven’t had a weekend with my college girlfriends since my wedding five years ago. This past weekend we did something about it. We are spread out around the country, so we picked a location and all met there. Vegas! It wasn’t exactly the wild Vegas trip people might expect from a bunch of college girls reuniting. This trip was a guy’s worst nightmare: days of nonstop chatter and catching up over ice cream and fun meals. We actually hardly left the hotel, which (me being the explorer) would typically bother me. Not this time. Five tired moms getting much-needed sleep, comfort from a friend’s ear and advice, and some good vitamin D at the pool.
We covered so many interesting topics, and I had plenty of aha moments. One that I want to share had to do with health and hard times. Each of us had the chance to tell our scary stories of motherhood, whether it was a risky delivery, postpartum depression, an autism scare, or H’s palate repair surgery. One friend received news while on the trip that her son would be having surgery on his skull. It seems nobody escapes scary motherhood experiences. So how do you get through them in a healthy way? For us, it seemed the answer was having friends by your side calling and checking in and praying for you. Regardless of where you are in your faith, when your child is having health problems and the situation is out of your control, you are desperate, and the idea of a God who loves your child and wants to protect him and has the power to move mountains is comforting. We also concluded that, during these times, it is important to share what’s going on; otherwise nobody can help you.
Another interesting topic of course was marriage and lifestyle. Spending an entire weekend listening to the ins and outs of each girl’s life gave me a chance to evaluate my life. One of my friends lives in Austin, and she shared that her family spends the weekend together biking into town and going to parks and really just poking around. For me, who lives out in the country, this sounded heavenly. I didn’t realize just how much I missed city living until I listened to her talk. Another friend talked about her tight community of friends from church. She said after she had her baby, she received meals for two months. Listening to her, I realized something obvious: you have to put in what you want to get out of something. It’s no wonder my church life and community don’t sound like hers; I simply go and listen to the sermon, say hello to the very few people I know, and leave. My friend helped me realize how much I missed being part of a close community.
We also spent time talking about the BFF, best friend forever. As your life changes, you change, locations change, and your childhood BFF might not be the BFF you need now. The fact remains, it’s important to have a go-to friend. Someone you can share life’s dirty deets with aside from your spouse. So how do you find that person? People are pretty open about being on the hunt for a boyfriend or spouse, but a BFF? Not so much. When Reagan and I moved to Maple Valley five years ago, I figured it would be a breeze to find new friends. Don’t get me wrong; I know many lovely people in Maple Valley whom I adore. I just don’t have that BFF who lives close by. It would be so great to have a friend nearby so that, when Reagan is on the campaign trail, H and I could go visit. Someone at the same age and stage. I realize now I do need that, and I am going to make a bigger effort with the people I have met. Again, you gotta put in what you want to get out of something.
What a wonderful weekend. I am truly blessed to have these amazing ladies in my life. I also feel completely refreshed and so excited to be back with my husband and son. Nothing like a little time away to make you REALLY appreciate what you have.